On the Value of Raising Kids in a Church Family: Andrew
In this interview, Andrew shares both the deep joys and everyday struggles of fathering two young girls. He shares his desire to be fully present for his girls, while grieving not being able to do so as the provider for his family. He opens up about how fatherhood has acted as a “mirror” to his selfishness, impatience, and longings for spontaneity and freedom, and how God has used these moments to grow and strengthen his faith. Finally, he shares the value of raising his girls in a church community—something he learned being exposed to Christianity and a church family early in life.
Photo: The L’estrelle family
Please introduce yourself!
Hi, my name is Andrew L’Estrelle, I’m 32, married to my beautiful wife Addie and together we have two girls – Emily who is 5 and Ellanor who is almost 2. We’re members at Providence Church Brisbane, having started as part of the launch team when the church was planted in 2015.
During the week I work for the Queensland Government and hobbies these days mostly revolve around the kids or various building and improvement projects around the house. I like gardening, making/building things, and pursuing simple creative outlets like cooking. When I get the time, I really enjoy going out to the country where I grew up, spending time in nature, and enjoying the tranquility of standing on a remote hill with no civilisation in sight.
2. What has been the greatest joy and challenge of being a Girl Dad so far?
The greatest joy I have found in parenting has been watching my girls grow and learn. Their sense of adventure and eagerness to explore the world, asking questions about how things work and why. Watching them achieve things they couldn’t do yesterday whether it be helping Emily learn to read or seeing the joy on Ella’s face when she finally masters jumping with both feet at the same time.
Growing into this role of ‘Dad’ has also been incredibly challenging, realising how selfish I am with my own time and desiring a level of spontaneity, freedom and independence that isn’t compatible with giving yourself up to be available and present for your kids. Working full-time and having to spend a significant portion of my week away from the kids has also been, and continues to be, a challenge for me. Switching off from work and trying to be as present as possible at the end of a long day is difficult, but as Ella runs toward me, with arms in the air screaming “DADDDAA” work quickly fades away. It’s in the little chats as I put them to bed and we try and catch up on the day that I find little moments of joy, for example, as Emily asks to pray together, and we read her bible together each night.
Growing into this role of ‘Dad’ has also been incredibly challenging, realising how selfish I am with my own time and desiring a level of spontaneity, freedom and independence that isn’t compatible with giving yourself up to be available and present for your kids.
3. You grew up in a Christian household and attending church and have remained in the faith into adulthood. How has your early exposure to Christianity shaped the way you parent your girls today?
I grew up in a Christian home and had the benefit of learning from and observing several solid, mature Christians as I grew up. I’m very grateful for the early exposure I had to Christianity, being in an environment where I was taught the bible and seeing Sunday church be prioritised and valued. This all provided a solid base for me to develop my knowledge of God and develop my own faith.
I have seen lots of men who are dedicated to their church and their families, and one common observation I have is that they were all present and committed, with church and family being clear priorities in their life. This has helped me tackle my own big decisions in life like where to buy a house and live, where to work, the type of lifestyle we seek and seeking to have church and community as a central priority of our week, seeking opportunity’s to open our home and serve people to model to our girls that our faith and our church family are central priorities that guide our decision making, not an afterthought that we fit into our otherwise secular lives.
Growing up in a Christian home has taught me the importance of providing an environment and space for my girls to learn and encounter authentic gospel community to allow them to develop their own faith in time. In 2021, I took 18 months long-term leave from work, and we sold our house and packed up all our things to build our own tiny home on wheels and travel the country together.
We loved our time away but returned to Brisbane to provide our girls a gospel-based church to grow up in—something I believe is so important in supporting my kids as they explore the gospel for themselves at a young age. We love our church community and I’m enjoying this phase of parenting particularly as our eldest Emily has started asking more questions about the bible and faith.
Growing up in a Christian home has taught me the importance of providing an environment and space for my girls to learn and encounter authentic gospel community to allow them to develop their own faith in time.
4. How does knowing God, the perfect Father, shape the way you parent your girls? How has God used fatherhood to grow and sanctify you?
The majority of the challenges I have faced in parenthood stem from my own selfishness and lack of patience, however I am coming to see joy in the mirror that parenthood holds up to our own lives as it presents opportunities for me to grow and mature in my own walk with God.
When faced with a child who ignores my first, second and 58th reasonable request to put their socks on (insert daily struggle here), rather than being discouraged and frustrated I am reminded to stop and act out of love and patience as I hear God calling out to me with grace and love, patiently waiting for me to respond to his reasonable request to love and follow him.
I have by no means mastered this yet, and God continues to work in my heart to grow me and to shape me as his son and as a father. I am thankful for the kids he has blessed me with, and the privilege it is to raise these two girls, and I pray that I can point them toward God’s grace and love through my parenting as they grow up and we face new and unchartered challenges together.
Andrew opens up about how the challenge of fatherhood has grown his faith, and the value of raising children in a gospel-based church community.
By Heidi Tai
On Learning Love & Patience as a Girl Dad: Chester
In this interview, Chester shares the joys and challenges of being a ‘Girl Dad’ and how God has used his daughters to grow him in love, patience, and prayerfulness. Having grown up in a non-Christian home, Chester also shares how knowing God the Father has influenced his parenting decisions and spiritual disciplines as a family.
Photo: Chester with his wife and girls
Please introduce yourself!
My name is Chester Wong, and I’ve been married to Ka for 19 years. We have two daughters: Ava, who’s 15 (yes, I’m in the teenage stage), and Jemma, who’s 11. We attend Auburn Anglican Church, a great place for our girls to see that God’s Kingdom is wonderfully diverse, with people from all over the world—perfect for a city like Sydney.
When I’m not ‘babysitting’ the kids (though they’ll tell you they’re too old for that), you can find me in lycra; cycling around Sydney or glued to the TV watching Formula 1. As our girls get older and more independent, they might not need us for every little thing, but that doesn’t mean they don’t need us. Sometimes, just being there—like now, as I’m sitting on Ava’s bed while she studies for exams—makes all the difference.
2. What has been the greatest joy and challenge of being a ‘Girl Dad’?
Being a ‘Girl Dad’ has been a crash course in hair conditioner, hair dryers, and mastering the art of JoJo Siwa bows. One of the biggest challenges? Learning how to do plaits—let’s just say I’m still in training. I’ve also had to figure out how to be gentle and soft. Growing up with a brother, we were always roughhousing, but with my girls, I’ve had to learn to use loving and encouraging words, and to keep my voice down. The joys? They love cuddles, and they’re always up for teaching me the latest TikTok moves.
3. How has coming to know God, the perfect Father, influenced the way you father your girls?
Growing up in a non-Christian home, I’ve had to rely heavily on prayer and to seek wisdom and guidance from other godly fathers to help me keep Jesus at the center of our family. God has really shaped my character, especially my temper. Early in my fatherhood, I noticed I was quick-tempered, much like my own dad. But as I look to Christ, I’ve been reminded that this isn’t the way to raise my girls in a loving and patient manner.
4. How has God used fatherhood to grow and sanctify you?
Fatherhood humbles me every day as I constantly question whether I’m doing enough to nurture my daughters in Christ and provide for their needs. I keep coming back to the truth that it’s God who ultimately shapes their hearts. Our hope is that they will genuinely love Christ and choose to follow Him.
5. What is one piece of advice that you would give to new Dads this Father’s Day?
Pray for your children often and pray with them every night. Before I tuck my girls in bed, even my 15-year-old, we read the Bible and pray together. This is our nightly anchor—a time to stay rooted in God’s word and prayer as a discipline. It’s also a wonderful opportunity to chat, play random games, and share a laugh.
Chester shares the joys and challenges of being a ‘Girl Dad’ and how God has used his daughters to grow him in love, patience, and prayerfulness.
By Heidi Tai
On the Joy & Grief of “Letting Go” of Adult Children: Eugene
Ahead of Father’s Day (Sunday 1st September), we’ll be sharing stories of everyday Christian fathers and how the gospel shapes their parenting. In this interview, Eugene Hor shares the joys and challenges of 24 years of fatherhood and celebrates how God has remained faithful to his children into adulthood. He also shares the difficulty of “letting go” of his adult children and how older fathers can continue to serve, lead and glorify God in their families.
Photo: Eugene with his family members Ashleigh, Pauline and Joshua.
Please introduce yourself!
I’m Eugene and I’ve been married to Pauline for 29 years. We’ve got two young adult children. My daughter Ashleigh’s 22 and my son Joshua’s 24. I’m currently the pastor at GracePoint Presbyterian Church in Sydney, a church we planted in 1999.
I’m not sure if I have hobbies. Pauline always says I have many interests that come and go, from archery to model cars to remote control cars to smoking meat to crossfit. The list is endless. My current interest right now is growing superhot chili peppers and making superhot sauces with my variety of reapers, scorpions and ghost peppers.
I’m finding myself in what an older pastor once called our third season in life and ministry. In our first season we’re learners and we’re making all our mistakes. In our second season, we’re practitioners and worked out what to do because we’ve learnt from our mistakes. In our third season we’re teachers trying to work out what we can really pour into and what foundation we can leave behind for the next generation.
I think we’re in our third season of life and ministry, and with our son getting married next year and our daughter possibly the year after, we’re trying to work out how we can best serve the gospel in the coming new season.
What has been your greatest joy and challenge as a father recently?
More recently my greatest joy as a father has been seeing both our children speak of GracePoint as their church, a church they love and want to continue serving at. They’ve approached disruption taking place in our church community with a maturity and love that I’ve been incredibly thankful for. That was always a worry for me when they were growing up, as church wasn’t always a place they wanted to be. There were seasons where church was boring, or they didn’t have peers and so didn’t want to go. But if you’re a pastor’s kid it’s not that easy bailing out on Sunday church growing up. I’m thankful it didn’t make them resentful, and I’m thankful that God kept them all these years.
I remember on our way to church one Sunday in the car when Joshua, who was in year 8 at the time, said, ‘I don’t want to go to church, it’s boring, it’s not fun.’ I remember using it as a teaching moment, asking him if he wanted to be a boy or a man one day. He said he wanted to be a man, and I remember saying to him that boys only want to have fun, but men do hard things. When things are no longer fun, they bail or run away.
Men take responsibility and do what’s good and right, even if it’s hard and boring, like Jesus. Men take responsibility and serve others, even when it’s hard and boring, like Jesus. Men take responsibility and care for others, even when it’s hard and boring, like Jesus. I told him that if all you want to do is have fun, you’ll never grow up to be a man. And church isn’t always going to be easy or fun, but we go because it’s good and right, and we go because we care and want to serve others like Jesus. I don’t know if he fully understood, but when I asked him again if he wanted to be a boy or a man, he said he wanted to be a man. That’s been a real joy for me seeing both our children do hard things when it comes to church and life, in being committed to loving and serving others like Jesus.
Church isn’t always going to be easy or fun, but we go because it’s good and right, and we go because we care and want to serve others like Jesus.
In terms of a challenge as a father, I think it’s challenging to let go as your kids get older. I’m certainly finding that hard. Pauline keeps reminding me that they’re independent young adults who will ask me for help if they need it. I still over-function as a dad and feel the need to do things for them even when help is unsolicited. Ashleigh recently said to me that she is informing me that she is going to Korea later this year for holidays, rather than asking me, as she knows what my response would be if she asked.
That’s challenging for me as I still see them as children who need my help and protection. I suspect they do, but not as dependent children, but as independent young adults. It’s challenging for me to make that shift. Part of making that shift is to recognise that I won’t always be able to be there for them as they leave home, but they will always have a heavenly Father who loves them and will care for them much more than I could ever do. I need to entrust them to his providential care and protection, and they need to look to him even more so as young adults.
How has knowing God the perfect Father shaped the way you fathered your own children?
Knowing God as a perfect Father has shaped the way I’ve fathered my children in two ways.
Firstly, it’s recognising that I’ll never be a perfect father to my children. I’m not just finite but also flawed and sinful. I might not be the perfect Dad and I can’t always be there for them, but they’ll always have a heavenly Father who’ll be there for them, and who’ll never fail them or disappoint them. So even as a Dad I always want to point them to their heavenly Father, a father who’ll always love them and be there for them. It was my practice all through high school when we dropped them off at school or when they caught the bus, to send them a SMS with a verse from the Psalms or a bible verse to let them know I’d be praying God’s presence, promises or truth for them, reminding them that they were never alone. It was my way of saying, ‘Daddy can’t always be there with you, but your heavenly Father will always be there for you, look to him and trust him.’
Secondly, it’s given me a better understanding of what it means to be a father the way God has been a perfect Father to me in two ways. He’s been a perfect Father who has loved me unconditionally and completely in the giving of his Son for me. That’s a reminder to me that I will always be loved even when I’ve failed. He’s also been a perfect Father who has powerfully overcome the one thing that can destroy me forever in the raising up of his Son over death for me. That’s a reminder to me that I’ll always be safe even when life is uncertain.
So even as a Dad I always want to communicate those two things to them as children.
I wanted them to always know that ‘Daddy will always love you and Daddy is always here for you even when things are hard.’ Practically this meant being physically present and available. Ashleigh certainly knew that and often took advantage of that as she would sometimes call me in the middle of my work meetings, knowing I would always pick up if she called – often to ask me if I could get her Krispy Kreme donuts on the way home. My kids have always grown up knowing that I will always be present and available for them.
I might not be the perfect Dad and I can’t always be there for them, but they’ll always have a heavenly Father who’ll be there for them, and who’ll never fail them or disappoint them.
Your children are now young adults. How can fathers of older children continue serving and leading their family for God’s glory?
I think as a father to adult children one of the ways we can continue serving and leading our families for God’s glory is to keep modelling to them the grace of the gospel in our lives and inviting them to walk with us the way we’ve walked with them growing up.
When they’re small they see it lived out in the way we serve and relate to others. As they grow into adulthood, we should be able to share more with them, and we should be able to invite them to walk with us in our personal challenges and ministry. When the kids were small, we would pray for them and instruct them. While we still pray for them and we give them unsolicited instruction as parents do, we also now share more with them, and we often seek their prayer and counsel in life and ministry. One could say that we need to see our children as partners in the gospel as they grow up.
God has blessed you with two children who have remained faithful in the Lord. What is one piece of advice that you would give to new dads this Father’s Day?
God has been gracious, and I don’t think we’ve done anything special that has led to our children remaining faithful to the Lord. We have, however, been committed to God’s ordinary means of grace for his people.
I would say this to any new Dad: Give yourself to regular prayer for yourself and for your children. Open the Bible and regularly read the word to your children. Help them know and understand God’s promises to them in the gospel. Teach and instruct them in living out God’s truth. Make Sunday worship with God’s people a priority as a family. Don’t deny them the sacrament of baptism as they’re children of God’s covenant community. Don’t deny them the promises of the gospel in the sign and seal of baptism. Give yourself to serving God’s people at church and involve them in serving with you.
Model for your children what it means to be a father who loves unconditionally and protects, the way your Heavenly Father has been a father to you in Jesus. More than anything else, recognise that you won’t always be a perfect Dad, but your children will always have a heavenly Father who has loved them in Jesus, and who wants to and will always be there for them. Always point them to him.
Eugene shares the joy and grief of "letting go" of adult children, and how older Dads can continue to serve, lead and glorify God in their families.
By Heidi Tai
On Balancing Work and Parenting as a Toddler Dad: Joshua
Ahead of Father’s Day (Sunday 1st September), we’ll be sharing stories of everyday Christian fathers and how the gospel shapes their parenting. In the first of the series, Joshua Fernandez shares the joys and challenges of fathering a high-energy toddler, how he strives to model God’s character as a Christian dad, and learning to balance family duties with work in a male-dominated Trades Industry. We hope you are encouraged by his story!
Photo: Joshua and his son, Leon.
Hi Josh! Please introduce yourself!
My name is Joshua Fernandez, and I am the husband of Katherine and father to Leon. I attend Fellowship Baptist Church in Lalor Park and have been there since I was 6 years old. My trade is a Security Technician, where I provide security and access to commercial and residential buildings through CCTV cameras, automatic doors, FOB access, alarms, etc. My hobbies include exercising, watching anime, playing video games, and throwing my son around the room because he enjoys flying and being upside down.
What has been your greatest joy and challenge in being a new father so far?
The greatest joy and challenge so far in being a new father is the shaping and moulding of the character of my son. It’s the greatest joy seeing Leon grow and learn new things, discovering his likes and dislikes, figuring out the limitations of his current physicality, and trying to understand where his “off” button is because he seems to have endless energy. The challenge is keeping up with his endless energy, keeping calm when he has a tantrum, and trying to feed him when he’s hungry but also doesn’t want to eat at the same time, just to name a few.
Finding balance when it comes to providing material things is another challenge. Growing up in an Asian and financially strict household has caused me to just buy the things my son wants (namely Monster Truck and Hot Wheels). It’s my way of making up for the things I missed out on when I was younger. There’s no greater feeling than making your child happy and seeing him fall asleep in the pram, holding a Hot Wheel car. The other side of that coin is also the challenge of making sure Leon understands that life isn’t always going to go the way you want it to. We aren’t going to be happy all the time, and we aren’t always going to get a Hot Wheel every time we ask for one.
How does knowing God, the perfect Father shape the way you parent your son?
My goal as a father, and obligation as a God-fearing man, is to emulate God the Father and his character so that Leon might see God in me. In doing so, I hope he can look to do the same for his life, as he grows to understand God and Christianity.
We, as sinners, can’t live to the standards of God all the time but we can continually and daily strive to live as God wants us to live. So, I daily strive to show God’s love, patience, and understanding, so that Leon may grow up knowing and understanding the right way to live, as well as who God is, and His position in my life. By showing my own failings and weaknesses to Leon and helping him understand why Papa still gets mad and makes mistakes, I can put God and His characteristics as the highest and perfect standard for Leon to strive for.
You work in a male-dominated Trades Industry that isn’t always friendly towards fathers who want to prioritise home duties. Can you share examples of how you have tried to be a witness in this culture?
I have been blessed and fortunate to not have experienced too much of this firsthand. There is only one instance where I was guilt tripped into coming back to work right after my son had just been born, but it ended as a non-hostile conversation, and it ended with me going on parental leave 2 weeks earlier than the dates I had applied for. My current co-workers are all about family, so it’s been easy to prioritise home and family before work, without being degraded for it.
As a Tradie, I make an effort to continue putting my family first, despite work and the deadlines that come with it. By putting family first, I can show those around me that life is more than just work, but a means God gives to us to provide for our families and to exercise creativity, practicality and problem solving outside of family.
If you could share one piece of advice to new fathers this Father’s Day what would it be?
The one piece of advice I can share would be to be more proactive within the home, help your wife out where you can and be mindful of how your wife and children are feeling. Doing the little things count. Washing baby bottles, folding laundry, loading and starting the dishwasher, preparing dinner. All these things help even if only a little bit.
Don’t get me wrong – you can make time for yourself and your hobbies, but don’t let your time come before your wife and child’s needs. There will be difficult days where it seems like everything you do is for everyone but yourself, but your wife will appreciate all that you do, and your children will see how present their father is.
Our duty as fathers isn’t just to physically provide for our families but to provide, sustain, and nurture the mental and spiritual aspects of our families. With God’s grace and strength, we have the ability to do these things and more.
Joshua shares the joys and challenges of fathering a toddler and learning to balance family duties with work in a male-dominated Trades Industry.
By Heidi Tai
On Fathering with Grace, Authenticity and Loving Discipline: Simon Kim
In the third installment of our Father’s Day blog series, Simon Kim shares the joys and challenges of fathering two young boys, and how becoming a father has magnified his understanding of God the Father’s love for sinners on the cross. He also shares how moments of discipline are “gospel opportunities” to model God’s love—something he learned from his own Christian father who extended grace and mercy in Simon’s moments of teenage rebellion. We hope you are encouraged by this story and testimony!
Photo: Simon, Minju and their boys Zion and Jude
Tell us a bit about yourself!
My name is Simon and I’m a Christian who has been married to Minju for 8 years and we have been blessed by God with two boys: Zion (5 years old) and Jude (10 months old). I was born and raised in Australia to Korean parents who immigrated in the 1980s. My parents began attending Saesoon Presbyterian Church when I was 8 years old and I’ve been there ever since. I am a member of the English-speaking congregation of Saesoon (New Life).
During the week, I work in procurement and contracting for a federal government department. When I have some time to myself, I tend to read (usually just current affairs these days), watch Netflix (currently Tour de France: Unchained), listen to podcasts (currently How Other Dads Dad with Hamish Blake), drink coffee, and catch-up with friends.
What are the joys and challenges of being a father to two young boys in this season of life?
Being a father to two young boys has filled me with such intense joy and also has been the most difficult season of my life. Minju and I were hesitant about having another child thrown into the mix of our family and disrupting the fragile equilibrium we felt like we deserved. But seeing how well Jude has fit into our family and especially watching Zion dote on his little brother has made us feel so blessed.
Our fears that we would be faced with the challenge of a jealous older sibling have not been realised and it has been a truly wonderful experience witnessing Zion take on the older brother role with such enthusiasm. Going through the newborn and infant stage with Jude and remembering how fast this stage goes has made me slow down and really try to cherish every moment of peak baby cuteness.
It’s also been a blessing watching how much our church community has loved on Jude and we’ve been so grateful for that. But I’ve honestly never been as physical, mentally, and emotionally drained as I am in this season of life. Like so many parents with babies, months of sleep deprivation is a tortuous nightmare that we don’t seem to be waking from. Sadly that can result in a lack of patience, grace and compassion towards my family. I lack the energy at the end of the day (after the kids are asleep) to use my time productively and wisely and so I frequently resort to empty comforts by vegging out in front of the TV.
Having young kids has also meant not being able to be as involved in the life of the church, like mid-week small groups and prayer meetings, which means I miss out on the very things at a time when I probably need it the most. I frequently find myself fighting feelings of guilt and shame because of unrealistically high expectations that I seem to have set for myself and fail to achieve in this season of life fathering two young boys. In sum: the highs are high and the lows are low, but I have absolutely no regrets.
What does being a Christian father mean to you? What makes Christian fatherhood distinct?
I’m probably not qualified to say what makes Christian fatherhood distinct. But as a Christian, what I have loved about becoming a father is the new way of understanding and experiencing the love of God. For me, the sacrifice that God made by sending his one and only Son into the world to die for sinners has taken on a new depth of meaning since becoming a father.
It’s hard for me to imagine giving over either of my sons to pain and suffering, let alone for the good of a people so utterly undeserving. If my sons are so precious to me, how much more would the Son of God have been been precious to God the Father? I’ve only had a relationship with my sons for a few years; the Father and Son have been in a pure, loving and perfect relationship since eternity past.
What kind of love does it speak of the Father that he would not allow the cup to pass from his Son, that he would send him to the cross to become sin, that he would allow him to be shamed and forsaken, for someone as undeserving as me? Being a Christian father has meant experiencing the gospel like this in new and powerful ways.
If my sons are so precious to me, how much more would the Son of God have been been precious to God the Father? I’ve only had a relationship with my sons for a few years; the Father and Son have been in a pure, loving and perfect relationship since eternity past.
Being a Christian father has also meant that I seek to approach discipline in a peculiar way. When Zion is deliberately disobeying me, I am tempted to try and simply manage the surface-level behavioural issues. I’ve read books that have helped me to navigate this space, providing me with practical tools to get Zion to listen. But as a Christian that is parenting with a gospel lens, I also remember that Zion is a sinner in need of a Saviour.
As a Christian father, I am called to help him realise this truth and moments of discipline are really moments of gospel opportunity. I fail at this all the time and it is something that I hope and pray that I am growing in because God knows I grieve and regret those moments when I’ve reacted to Zion harshly and unlovingly when faced with his sinful heart. But by the grace of God there have been moments when I believe that I’ve helped him take a step closer to understanding the grace, mercy and love of God in Christ.
Moments of discipline are really moments of gospel opportunity.
So my aim as a Christian father who is distinct from the world, in that I am seeking to raise my children in such a way that they might one day place their own trust in Jesus for salvation. I am trying to demonstrate to them what a genuine and authentic relationship with God might look like. I want them to not only grow up understanding the gospel but experiencing the gospel in real and tangible ways. I want them to know that following Christ in this world is challenging, complex and costly, but it can also be full of joy, grace and glory, and there is nothing else in life that compares with Jesus. I know I’m going to be far from perfect at achieving this aim but I’m not called to be perfect in this; I’m simply called to point my children to a perfect Saviour.
I am trying to demonstrate to them what a genuine and authentic relationship with God might look like. I want them to not only grow up understanding the gospel but experiencing the gospel in real and tangible ways.
What does discipleship look like in the home for your family? How have you seen God at work in your children so far?
To be honest, this is something that I’m still figuring out. It’s also challenging because discipleship looks different at different stages of life, especially with children who grow and change quickly in the early years. Whilst I consider discipling my children to be my primary role as a Christian father, I’m also relying on my church community to be a part of that discipleship.
What my wife and I seek to do in the home is display to our children what an authentic life of following Christ looks like. A key part of that is reading our Bibles and praying to God. We also spend most nights reading a kids Bible and praying with Zion before bed. Zion has always loved reading and so we also have a range of Christian books that we like to read to him (currently The Ology: Ancient Truths, Ever New by Marty Machowski). We also like to open our home to people from our church community so that our children can learn hospitality organically and be around other Christians (who are not their parents). We have a lot of conversations with Zion about matters of faith and we make sure that we take the time to answer as honestly and sincerely as possible as we remember that he might not always be so curious in the future. Both Zion and Jude were baptised recently which was a great opportunity for us to explain to Zion what this ordinance was and the meaning behind it.
Whilst I personally think that Zion is still too young to make his own decision to place his trust in Christ, we have definitely seen God at work in his life through the various ways that we are bringing him up in the Lord. We sometimes ask him when people are over for dinner whether he would like to pray before we eat and when he does my wife and I are always so blessed to hear the words of a child’s pure prayer to God. When he knows that someone he loves is sick, he remembers to pray to God for them before he sleeps.
It’s clear to us that he has a desire to know God through reading the Bible – there are so many other books that he could read but he’s insisted on having us read his kids Bible multiple times. Just the other night he told me that he shared about Jesus to his best friend in preschool (and also commented that whilst people might know Jesus, not all believe in him). I can only hope and pray that God would continue to work in both Zion and Jude as Minju and I do our best to raise them in the Lord.
Who has been a “spiritual Dad” figure in your life, and what lessons did you learn from him?
My earthly dad has been the closest thing to a “spiritual Dad” figure in my life. Even though there were linguistic and cultural challenges in our relationship (as the child of most immigrants will tell you), there were key moments embedded in my memory that shaped the person that I am today. When I was in primary school, my parents had a renewal of faith and they became very active in the life of the church. While I didn’t understand a lot of how my own dad related to God, I could at least see that he did have his own personal relationship with God and learned that it was possible for me to have one too. I also learned from a young age the importance of the local church in the life of a believer and to take seriously what it means to love and serve the church, as my dad humbly did for years.
I remember when I was caught committing a misdemeanour in my high school years, I was afraid of how my dad was going to respond when he found out. When he came home that day, to my complete surprise, instead of dispensing the punishment I undoubtedly deserved, he apologised to me for not being there enough as a dad. I remember weeping in front of him at this act of mercy shown towards me and the humility of co-bearing the responsibility of my wrongdoing. I learned through that experience what the gospel looked like in action and it has stayed with me.
In my university days, I was attending church every Sunday but I wasn’t a Christian. Since I was still living under my parents’ roof, I told my dad that I didn’t want to attend church anymore. I told him that if he forced me then I was afraid that I would grow to resent and hate him for it. To my surprise, he still insisted that I go because he knew that if I stopped attending church then I would miss out on regularly hearing the gospel explicitly preached at church on Sundays. He considered that was more important than anything else and risked the resentful hatred of his only son because he believed in the power of the gospel to save. (Soon after this heated conversation I experienced a renewal of faith of my own.) I learned from my dad that as important familial relationships were, my eternal spiritual relationship with my Heavenly Father was more important, and that having access to regular gospel preaching and teaching was critical for one to come to faith.
I’m still in the process of absorbing and applying these lessons in my own life and relationship with my children. If my boys grow up and are able to say, just like I am, that their earthly father was also their “spiritual Dad” figure then I know that by the grace of God I’ve done something right as a Christian father.
I learned from my dad that as important familial relationships were, my eternal spiritual relationship with my Heavenly Father was more important.
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By Heidi Tai
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